Happy Easter from Talk About It

Smush Parker Was A Little Too Hands-On for Pat Riley

"Send it in, Jerome"

It is never a bad time to hear those immortal words from March Madness's Mad Hatter Bill Raftery, but I'm going to see my team Pitt in the Garden tonight and this college basketball at its maddest.

Brett Favre Cries, Jackie Gets Turned On

Green Bay Packer QB, Brett Favre retired from football after 17 years in the NFL, 16 of them with the Packers. Favre held a press conference (see below) and displayed one of my favorite emotions: tough-guy trying not to cry.

Sure Favre is a great player and a pretty likable guy. He was great in "There's Something About Mary." I'm a Pats girl, not a Packer fan, I don't care so much about his retirement. When Tom Brady retires I will certainly shed some tears. I started watching the press conference just to have something on as white-noise. Then I became transfixed.



Here are some highlights:

0:15: We are a scant 15 seconds into the press conference and Favre shows his first sign of emotion. He does the ole "shake it off" trick. When that doesn't work he scratches his nose a bunch. You're not fooling us, Brett! You don't have a booger. You're gonna weep. When the scratching doesn't work he makes a "zurrrbrpt" sounds with his lips. Yup, a "zurrrbrpt" sound. If you don't believe me, watch.

Then he says, "I promised myself I wouldn't get emotional." I feel for him here. I make promises with myself I never keep: I promised myself I wouldn't have that second bottle of wine, I promised myself to sleep only 10 hours tonight, I promised myself not to place Ebay bids on clothes I already own...I feel your pain, Brett!

0:29: Ok, this is probably my favorite part in the whole thing and the reason why I wanted to write this post in the first place. Favre is trying to say "I hope that every penny that they [Packers] spent on me, they know was money well spent." It takes him 37 seconds to say this sentence. 37 seconds! I clocked myself saying this a few times and every time I said it, I came in under 10 seconds. He took nearly four times the average time to say it! (I am deeming my test the "average" for this post.) Brett actually takes a 20 second pause to try to collect himself. And he fails beautifully.

What does he do in his 20 second pause?
- He snorts. I mean a serious snotty snort. He breathes in and out a few times then sucks in a mad snort. And guess what? It is not disgusting. It is one of the sexiest things I've ever seen. (Why is repressed emotion so hot? I don't think I want to know the answer I am sure it is some sort of Elecktra/Daddy thing hardwired in my brain. I've got to remind myself to NOT bring this to therapy.)
- He covers his mouth
- He presses his eyes...He is physically trying to keep his sadness/tears in. That's an athlete for you, trying to control the body.
- Back to the mouth
- Big exhale
- Time to fix my collar!
- Sniffles
- Breathing
- Look to the heavens

4:11: More sniffing and snorting.

I guess one of things that is so interesting about a man crying is we glimpse into how he would act during sex. Crying, like sex, is intimate and vulnerable. So when Brett Favre gets all emotional one can imagine him in a delicate moment with the same intensity and passion. And, of course, it is now easy to imagine him crying after sex.

When A Fould Isn't A Foul

Another Coach Losses His Mind

Monday Brought To You By The Patriots

Philly's Never-Win-A-Super-Bowl Shuffle '88

Ever Tried To Hit A Baseball In A Sailboat?

The roof is supposed to resemble a sail and I suppose it does. But it also kinda looks like a kids' pillow fort. Not to mention that the long post in the outfield originally reminded me of Montreal's Olympic Stadium.

(Yahoo Sports)

Holland Stlye

TAI fans get a double dose of ironic goodness. Not only has John McEnroe continued his quest to endorse ANY product, he has dragged our very own TIM CURCIO down with him.

KNICKS Players Can't Even Co-exist on the Bench

Surprise Surprise! It didn't take long for Zach Randolph to revert back to his childish ways and get into an altercation with a teammate. Randolph, if you remember punched teammate Ruben Patterson in the face during a practice scuffle in 2003, was seen last night throwing some water in Nate Robinson's face. I love the leadership or lack thereof on the Knicks squad as nobody got into either players face over the situation. I got to tell you I would not even want Isiah directing me as I tried to parallel my car into a tight spot, let alone lead my basketball team. It is time for James Dolan to see the light and fire Isiah.

Episode 13: Shaq Vows To Bring Super Bowl Back To New England

Download it here.


The Talk About it Idiots have a belated Valentines Day gift for you...another podcast! Whoa! Let's have a parade. Jackie and Tim start off episode "unlucky 13" with the Hitlist: is Brian McNamee a "psycho," do all Mets pitchers like cock...fighting, and hockey gets interesting with a near decapitation. Tim gets his NBA loving panties in a bundle with the Gasol/Shaq trades. Jackie wants to remind people that Shaq is still an old fat man. And the Idiots end with the Superbowl. Jackie is in a state of horrified shock over the Pats loss and still contends that if David Tyree were in jail he wouldn't have caught that insane pass, Tim is just happy that he got to talk about the NBA a segment earlier.

Never miss a podcast. Subscribe to th RSS feed here.

Josh Beckett Channels Shaq's Offseason Regiment

This image has to be a bit discouraging for Red Sox fans, as Beckett seems to have spent more time at the buffet than on the mound.

Berman's Favorite Curse Word

ESPN pulls down the Chris Berman videos off of YouTube. Guess they were not too happy with everyone finding out what a jerk Berman actually is.

Miami Heat 2.0

The dust has settled and it is now time to look at the new run and gun Miami Heat. The big news coming out of the NBA yesterday was Miami sending Shaquille O'Neal to Phoenix for Shawn Marion and Marcus Banks. While it is sad to see Shaquille the personality leave South Florida, his on court prowess had faded away. Without the talent to surround O'Neal with his skills seemed to diminish to the point where the Heat even with both him and Wade on the court still struggled for a win. Even with the dreams of landing a top 3 draft pick becoming a reality, the Heat seemed years away from getting their act together, so moving Shaq was the right move.

Not only did they move Shaq and his large contract, but they got back a 4 time all star, Shawn Marion, and young point guard who has not reached his potential, Marcus Banks. Maybe Banks will never reach his potential or maybe he just needed a team that had no other viable options. Banks came into the league as a super fast score first point guard, and that is still what he is 5 years into the league. Banks was brought to Phoenix for those reasons, but the Suns soon realized that they needed more of a setup guy with all of their scorers on the roster, however the Heat have no such issue. Banks joins a team that has all but given up on Jason Williams and has to have come to the realization by now that Chris Quinn is nothing more than a backup. A serviceable backup who can hit some shots from outside, but he is not a lead guard. Maybe Banks seizes the moment and fills the hole at the point or maybe he just becomes another contractual burden, at the end of the day he was just a throw-in to get Shawn Marion.

Marion is young and energetic player who can play at either forward spot, while guarding any player on the court. There is nothing on the court athletically that he can't do, and that was always on display with the fast breaking Suns, but will his game translate to the Eastern Conference? Marion has always thought of himself as a top ten player in the NBA, who was underutilized in the Suns offense, and that created a rift in the locker room. Like I mentioned earlier, the Heat are not a roster that has many options for scoring outside of Wade, so Marion will always have the green light. Even if he proves himself wrong and is not a go to guy, he is so active that it is hard to believe that he won't still get 15-20 points just being around the bucket.

Marion's activity is what has made him an all star and a stat sheet filler. He will help right away, cause he gets his hands on so many balls. Whether it is via rebounding, blocking shots, or getting steals; he has one of the best all around games. Many scouts have said that he is the reason that the Suns are able to play fast paced so effectively. His constant motor forces the tempo on both ends of the court. With Alonzo Mourning out for the season the Heat has no defensive identity, but Marion will quickly change that. Hopefully the sight of Marion locking down the other teams best player will inspire Wade to lock in defensively as well. For as great as Wade is on offense he has been abissmal on defense, and if the Heat is going to ever turn it around he needs to make the commitment to playing both ends. That is what made Michael Jordan the best and that is why separates Kobe Bryant from Dwayne these days.

So the All Star Game is a few weeks away and the Heat have made the choice to fully rebuild around Wade, with hopes that Marion can be the perfect complement, but if the season does not show enough promise expect Marion to opt out and the Heat would then have tons of cap space to pursue another superstar in a great crop of free agents.